Okay, Now I’m Just Mad

While I’ve been supportive of #OccupyOakland since it’s beginning, showing up from time to time for marches, chatting at the camp, scratching some of the Occupying Doggie bellies, I remained pretty dispassionate about it all. But this shit . . . this shit ain’t right.

I bailed on work for a few hours this morning to check out the aftermath. I was expecting the worst but not quite how emotional the worst would make me. I was, quite honestly, shaking with a mixture of rage and sorrow. I was, to be even more honest, close to tears. Perhaps it was because I had so little invested in it all, and thus felt slightly guilty? Maybe it was just a general sense of impotence? But I wanted to scream “You break ours … We break yours,” and not as an idle threat.

This is all so unbecoming the distanced posturing we’re supposed to take at AUFS. But fuck it: I am angry.

UPDATE: This post was written in a strange emotional place. I want officially to retract my “distanced posturing” comment here. It wasn’t intended as a snipe but I certainly see how it functions as such. Not in any way related to the greater point of the post, such as it is, but I do retract.